Problem: RL people invading your fandom life. No longer able to post as much porn as you want.
Solution: NEW UNDERGROUND FANDOM TUMBLR. POST WHATEVER.
In other words, this is my dedicated fandom tumblr. My regular tumbly is cactusrabbit.tumblr.com, just in case you were interested.
My Ao3
Hannibal-King Arthur Crossover fic. Where is it?
Because I’m an exceedingly silly person and desire both Hannigram and Galahad/Tristan. At the same time.
Eat the fandom elite
This tends to happen whenever a creative work is revised or revamped in any way and it’s very, very silly.
Lately, it’s been happening in the Hannibal fandom.
Lol at all these people getting butthurt about “OMGZ FANNIBALS ARE RUINING THE HANNIBAL LECTER FANDOM FOREVERRRRRRRR”
Calm the fuck down, guys. I was all in love with the books first too but I’m not going to bash on new fans and try and play Queen of Cannibal Hill.
- The Hannibal books/movies are a robust franchise and cultural icon. Nothing’s going to RUIN THEM FOREVERRRRR.
- Porny fic has never ruined anything. Invest in Tumblr Savior or simply learn to live with it. If I can learn to ignore the copious amounts of Thorki that slip through my Tumblr Savior net, then YOU can learn to live with Hannibal slash popping up on your dash.
- Just because YOU WERE HERE FIRST doesn’t mean you get special treatment. In all actuality, you WEREN’T there first. NO ONE was there first. It’s fandom, not a damn race.
- Fandoms need to grow OR THEY WILL DIE. Which means LESS STUFF FOR FANS TO ENJOY. Being a bully will only result in potential new fans not wanting to join in on the fun. Less fans= fandom death.
- People are going to interpret and enjoy things differently. Get over yourself and stop harshing everyone else’s fun.
- We’re all here because we love the same thing. We already have every reason to get along and act civil.
THIS HAS BEEN A POST. THANK YOU AND GOODNIGHT.
Hey everyone! I’m going to try this and hopefully there is some interest.
I started this tumblr about two months ago and it already has more watchers than my personal blog that’s been around for years. To thank everyone I thought I’d do this (kind of) give away!
Two winners will get to have themselves (or their preferred persona, avatar, character, etc) illustrated as a supporting character in an upcoming comic! (Sample shown above)
Rules:
★Likes and Reblogs both count.
★Please be courteous and don’t spam your friends and followers.
★You do not have to be watching this blog.
★If your preferred avatar is not you, please choose one that would fit into a high school setting (aka, human, but that human can be a bit out there)
I’ll choose the winners on March 30th, please have your ask box open if you enter!
Thank you all and good luck!
Tea (giveaway) time!
Only two winners this time… You’ll get either
John Thornton (+ Margaret Hale, cause they’re a ship)
or
Thorin Oakenshield.
- only reblogs count, likes do not
- first winner gets to choose which one, so make sure your askbox is open for me to contact you
- giveaway ends next this sunday, March 24th 2013.
Good luck! :)
Always reblog for tea
#795 I could never visualize any of the Dwarves in the Company with a skinny lady; they need a voluptuous lady Dwarf in every meaning of the word. All boobs, belly, hips, bum, hair and attitude.
Most definitely agreed! One of the main things that is helping with my curvier, rapidly aging self-image is identifying myself with all these stout and lovely and fierce dwarrowdams. Axes and cleavage, baby.
The jewelry helps a lot, too.
Reblogging for “Axes and Cleavage, baby.”
(Source: kinkyhobbitconfessions)
because some people ask for more chubby kili, so i did it with pleasure :3
How on earth is that “chubby”? I guess looking like “a person who is fairly fit but doesn’t visit the gym every day” counts as “chubby” these days….
Waaaaah
It annoys me when people act like shipping and shippers just RUIN EVERYTHING FOREVER. Like shippers goofing around is apocalyptic and will DESTROY THE DIGNITY of a work of art, even if that work is some decades old and very robust in terms of popularity.
For example, I hate bananas with a fiery passion but I don’t scream and cry when I see the banana display at Walmart and yell “BANANAS ARE RUINING MY SHOPPING EXPERIENCE SO SICK AND AWFUL EW OH GOD”.
Also shipping is still a pretty obscure and silly pastime.
Give your hearts and blood pressure a rest and chill the fuck out.
Weigh-In Wednesday
Today’s topic, submitted by malkos:
How old is Kain? Blood Omen 2 starts off with him as a fledgling and a human of probably mid to early twenties, judging from his disposition and the setting of the game. When we meet Kain in Soul Reaver 1, Raziel says that Kain has led the clans for a millennium… But we all know that there was a time before Kain led the clans and brought humanity to it’s knees.
Then there’s also the problem of how long he had to wait around for Raziel to ascend? And the issue of how long has Kain been plotting all of this stuff to figure out the outcome, etc.
(If you’d like to submit a topic for Weigh-In Wednesday, here’s the place to do it)!
Well, it’s hard to say Kain’s exact age, considering differing timelinest. Let’s just work with the one that includes BO2 (post SR2 paradox blah blah blah)
We know from dialogue in SR2 (when Kain and Razzle-Dazzle run into each other at the Pillars) that Kain was 30 years old when the whole martyrdom thing happened. So he was probably murdered middle-late in his 29th year or very soon after he turned 30.
So, base age= 30.
Then he began his first little temper-tantrum I WILL BE KING thing, which spanned 200 years until he was taken out of commission by the Sarafan Lord and his traitor lieutenants.
Kain is now approx 230 years old.
He lay unconscious for 200 more years and was revived and then BO2 happened.
Kain is now ~430.
After BO, he set out to raise his six NEW lieutenants. In the intro to SR1, Raziel states that he has served Kain for ‘a millennium’ (the wiki says 1500 years, but that doesn’t agree with dialogue, so I’m ignoring it)
Kain is now ~1430 years old, at least. Give or take 50-100 years here or there, because vampires are bad at timekeeping. Also Nosgoth is all fucked up.
Then Kain tosses Raziel into the abyss, where Razzle-Dazzle is stuck in the spin cycle for (according to the Wiki) 500 years.
At the time of SR1, Kain is ~1930 years old.
Now it gets weird. SR2-Defiance has so much time-travel fuckery it’s difficult to say how much time actually passes. At one point Raziel is some 500 years ahead of Kain in the timeline. For easiness, let’s just say that if you started a stopwatch from the beginning of SR2 stopped it at the end of Defiance, you’d end up with 1-2 years actual time.
Making Kain ~1932 years old.
Now, taking into account all the weirdness and time travel and gaps in history, I’m estimating Kains age at ~2500 years at the end of Defiance. Raziel is actually not that much younger, at ~2000 years old at his time of “death” in Defiance.
Janos and Vorador? Yeah, not touching that one.
Stop me, plz
On a sparkly and bedazzled morning, Thorin sat on the throne under the mountain. It was Valentine’s Day and he was all alone. His hip ached in sorrow for the secret love that he could never share. How could he expect Bilbo to love someone with a hopeless nostril?
Clumsily, he began to recite a poem he had composed. “Ah, my love is like a braided purple purse, all on a summer’s day. I wish my Bilbo would fondle me, in his own boring way…”
“Do you?” Bilbo sat down beside Thorin and put his hand on Thorin’s ankle. “I think that could be arranged.”
Thorin gasped stupidly. “But what about my hopeless nostril?”
“I like it,” Bilbo said cheerfully. “I think it’s sticky.”
They came together and their kiss was like a school of piranhas devouring an unfortunate cow.
“I love you,” Thorin said drunkenly.
“I love you too,” Bilbo replied and fondled him.
They bought a sandpiper, moved in together, and lived religiously ever after.
So sexy
I *ahem* ‘wrote’ you guys a sexy Bilbo/Thorin fanfic using the Drabblematic.
I’m Dreaming Of A Waxy Christmas
It was Christmas Eve. Bilbo sat dazedly on top of Bag End, sipping sexy eggnog.
He looked at the elastic box of hair dye hanging on the Christmas Tree and sighed. Last year, Thorin had hung it there, just before they looked at each other breathlessly and then fell into each other’s arms and stroked each other’s tragus.
If only I hadn’t been so liberal, Bilbo thought, pouring a white amount of rum into his eggnog. Then Thorin might not have got so supple and left me all alone at Christmas time. He wiped away a quilted tear and held his palm in his hand.
Suddenly, there was a knock at the door and then a suntanned voice lifted bluntly up in song.
I’m dreaming of a waxy Christmas
Just like a spoiled child screaming for sweets in the supermarche’
Bilbo ran to the door. It was Thorin, looking freckled all over with snow.
“I missed you quizzically,” Thorin said. “And I wanted to stroke your tragus again.”
Bilbo hugged Thorin and started to sob.
“I think you’re drunk,” Thorin said.
“I think so too,” Bilbo said and they stroked each other’s tragus until they knocked the Christmas tree over.
On Christmas Day, they ate roasted tapir nipple and lived saucily until Bilbo got drunk again.




